Pressure

There’s this pressure on my chest

In my core

On my mind

You are running through it all

Day long

Like a song

I can’t get you out of my head

Or out of my bed

I’m on my meds

To release some of the pressure

That’s building

Never subsiding

The image of you

Scent of you

What can I do

To lessen the yearning

To be with you

Touching you

To hear your voice

To feel your choice

In stroking traces along my body

I am captivated by the scent

Of your perfume

The traces of you in bed

The evidence of being near you on my sweater

It’s not about just making love

It’s about that satifisying connect

That is otherwise insatiable

With any other

We don’t even have to go deep

Anymore into the reccesses of our minds

Just comfortable silence

The chance to hold your hand in mine

And just exist

To just be

You and me

So free

 

©AyalaRain

I Was Someone for a Moment

As I was singing with all my emotions bare

And feeling the music surge through my marrow,

I turned to face him momentarily

And caught him looking at me like he saw me,

Like he could see my soul

And what he saw was something beautiful,

Like I was beautiful.

The elation I felt from someone of his caliber

Looking at me, like I was actually someone deemed worthy,

Was the most incomparable high I had ever experienced.

The moment was fleeting

And I fell off my cloud

Sooner than I was ready for my feet to touch the ground again.

But as quickly as that glance was given and then gone,

It gave me something to believe in again

When I had just begun to lose hope,

And began believing I was becoming invisible.

©AyalaRain

Nerves

Looking out into the crowd from her perch

She sees nothing but silhouettes in darkness

The lights expose her expression, body, every curve

Perspiration over her brow, her silence

Exposed on a simple stage

With a set of warm spotlights

Beaming directly at her face

Not quite a deer in headlights

But the energy of intimidation is emitted

Only briefly though

Because she has been well versed on

Faking it until you make it

She sucks in a deep inaudible inhale

Sits up straight

Her lips curl to reveal a smile

And as she exhales she begins to play.

 

©AyalaRain

Georgia on my Mind

I go for the peaches and its sweetness

Can’t keep away

Even if such a fruit produces a sour taste along my tongue

I don’t question my stay

I stay as long as need be to taste

The incredibly sweet peach

The moment is fleeting and feels like the distance

Grows its reach

Further and further away from being able to obtain that taste

But I extend my hand delicately up the tree

Making sure to not be too early nor too late

Regardless the after taste or if

The anticipation was falsely advertised a closer reach

I’ll always go

To get a chance to experience the sweetness of a Georgia Peach.

 

©AyalaRain

Fill You

I want to fill you up and feed your spirit

Whatever it requires to keep your passion and fires burning bright

I’ll allow pieces of me to be consumed in you

I want to be everything, do everything your muses do

For you,

I’m at your disposal

Use this energy I’ve grown and bottled up

While being that lady in waiting

For a kiss, to be your temporary miss

Take it and use it to fuel yourself

And feed your spirit

Whatever comes of it, I’m sure it’ll be good

Whatever you will create will soon be my food.

 

©AyalaRain

Hangover

Sometimes when the fog comes rolling in

It feels more like a hangover

Like my spirit felt full of gladness

Enjoying borderline euphoria.

But after night turns to day

Nothing from before remained

The gladness dissipated slowly

As I slumbered, quietly lay

The drunkenness of being happy

Slips slowly back out of my system

Leaving me to be gently awakened

By slivers of light promises

Waiting to be broken.

I blink slowly, letting the fog cover me

Thickly, like a warm mink blanket

Providing comfort from a cold night.

It feels too heavy to lift off me

I think I may succumb today,

I don’t have the energy to fight

I want to stay cozy with all my thoughts in bed.

Safe from any collateral damages happening

By staying in my own head.

Maybe tomorrow I’ll try to stand up again.

 

©AyalaRain

Making Out in the Back of the Theater

Where did my youthfulness go
Away
So soon, too soon
I wish it had stayed
Just a bit longer
Long enough for me to know
Things I didn’t before
Like confidence
Seductiveness
Intelligence
To apply all this
While I was younger
Before my virtue had left me
Before age had taken away
Some of the authenticity
Of my smile
Before the lines accompanied
The corners of my eyes
Before my sex appeal had died
Where did my youthfulness go
Away
So soon, too soon
Way too soon
I wish it had stayed
Just a bit longer

 

©AyalaRain

Silent

Legs intertwined, trying to keep warm on this cold wintry night
Your skin against mine warms me up internally
Like the affect of a shot of whiskey can give someone
Whose heart has been icy for sometime
Feeling your sweet breath against my face as you slumber
Helps me breathe again on my own because
Somewhere along the way I had forgotten how
The strength of the beating of your heart
I feel it in the palm of my hand
It reminds me of the sound of my own rhythm
The one that has been silent for a while now.

 

©AyalaRain

The Reality of It

When I dream of you,

So many beautiful things arise

The perception I have of you

Is greatly amplified

The curve of your jaw is sharp

The intensity of your eyes are smoldering

The softness of you lips, exhilarating

In my dream your love reciprocates

The deep regards I have for you

You hold me like you don’t want me to leave

And that I’m set apart from the few

You’ve encountered before.

But dreams are just dreams

Of alternate subconscious realities

Of silly wishful thinking.

You’ve encountered plenty like me before.

You don’t hold me like you use to anymore.

But even knowing this and feeling the expiration

Of the flame we once cradled together

A long time ago when I was convinced

You’d be my forever

I still see you as someone so undeniably beautiful.

 

©AyalaRain

Anyone’s Queen

I do believe in romance

I do believe in true love

I do believe in that Hollywood moment

Of being pushed against a wall and kissed deeply, oh

But with my true destiny

I wasn’t made for this

I wasn’t created to be anyone’s Queen

And I’m alright by this.

Because I can watch the beauty from a distance

I can see it all unfold

Whether black or white of specks of grey

It’ll never get old

Because even if I were as pretty

As many have been lead to believe

I wasn’t made to be anyone’s Queen

And that’s alright by me.

I can have the passion aimed at something else

No man will ever love me, as deeply as they tend to love themselves and the world.

I was never designed to be anyone’s Queen

And to be honest this doesn’t make me sad anymore

Knowing this makes me truly free.

 

©AyalaRain