Body Dysmorphia Part 2

After enjoying a nice summer day at my neighbors’ pool at the age of eight,

I ran back home since the sun began its descention from the sky.

Happy go lucky, I reflected the day of playing mermaids with my friend, as I waited for the door to open.

The heat insulated between my body and the towel I wrapped around myself.

The door creaked open, and I could feel the inviting coolness from the air inside.

My mother looked down on me, and with an inquistive look asked,

“Whose little daughter are you?”

I giggled at the joke and reassured her I was hers.

She shook her head and exchanged, “No, no you are way too dark to be my daughter.”

After a minor banter with my mother, she eventually let me in,

Looking at me, passing her by, with disapproving eyes,

Scolding me for not heeding her deliberate warnings to not play in the sun for too long.

When I entered my bathroom to clean up for the night

An image in the mirror caught my eye.

Starring back at me was a girl with big, brown eyes,

A round face framed with frizzy, kinky, dark, curly, poofy hair,

With skin darker than most of the other little girls in our small town.

Looking down at my hands, my tanned arms and legs, I began to question…

 

©AyalaRain

 

Flickers of Memory

I miss how you would just encapsulate my body into your embrace throughout the night
Just submersing myself into your bodily warmth was my most favorite place to be

I adored how you would kiss me as if you truly cherished me
every contact intense with passion but those that were also light
On my forehead, my navel, my ear, inner thigh
Curiously enough never a cheek

The brush of your fingers tracing my face before you took me in for a passionate french.

 

©AyalaRain